Hmmmm, someone else thinks just as I do:

It is so nice out! Get off your laptop and get outside!

To Cheat? Or Not to Cheat? Um, Not?

If I had a nickel for every times someone asked me what I eat for my cheat days, I would have....well, probably only a few dollars. A whole day of cheating? No. No. NO!

We live a healthy lifestyle, we eat healthy, we work out, we are fit, and we try and change ourselves for the better. Sometimes, unfortunately you have to cheat. There, I said it! I am not going to act high and mighty and say I never cheat, we all do. But what do you 'cheat' with? Is it a burger and fries and a large shake from the ol’ time diner down the street? Or is it a bottle of wine to drink with your girls? If you are still at the point where you REALLY cheat, like binge and have massive meals, then you haven't educated yourself enough. I swear that once you do, you will not want to 'cheat' with massive loads of fatty crap.

Cheating for me is different now. Before I educated myself on food, I was one of those girls that had a McDonalds cheat meal "Hey you were good all week, you deserve a break" God! How ludicrous is this? We worked hard and ate healthy all week, and your "reward" is to negate all your hard work with 1000 calories of crap? So stupid! Reward yourself with clothes, or a pedicure, not food that will make you fat!

Now, a "cheat" is going out to a restaurant and accepting the fact that my whole wheat sandwich bread is going to contain sugar and enriched flour, or that my organic free range beef burger with no bbq sauce or ketchup did not have all that fat squeezed out of it and then rolled in paper towel to get the leftover fat off (beef a la fit bitch style) or perhaps a good “cheat” would be having some drinks and then at 2am splitting a veggie pizza slice on pizza corner when you are visiting your girlfriends and it is the first time all of you have been together in two years (What? Were we going to sit around and drink water and eat carrots? I went for a run and did push-ups and plyometric intervals in the park (while everyone stared at me) before the party night commenced). Popcorn with no butter during a movie? More calories then you really should have consumed for that delicious meal out at that restaurant you have been dying to go to. Now the cheats, well...they aren’t SOO bad. Make sure you work out extra hard that day ;)

We don't diet!

So a woman in my office is attempting to be somewhat healthy (and I use ‘attempt’ and ‘somewhat’ loosely), let’s call her ‘Betty’ another woman (let’s call her ‘Veronica’) was going to pick up lunch and asked Betty if she would like a big Mac meal, Betty said "no" (yay, good for Betty). But 10 minutes later, what does Veronica show up with? A second big Mac meal back for Betty anyway. What the Sweet Fuck? And do you think Betty said "no, I am not eating that as I told you I didn't want one" nope, instead she said "oh Veronica, well since you bought it I have to eat it".


Can you frigin imagine? I am sure if Betty said no, Veronica’s feelings would have been hurt. What a bunch of babies.

Immediately after that, not one, NOT two, BUT THREE!!! Three different people said "wow, aren't you healthy" in regards to my lunch (ww tuna and veggie wrap no condiments & a bowl of cut up veggies no dressings) so after the third Mrs. Obvious pointed this out to me I very calmly and un-snappily said "people say that to me almost every day, did you ever think that perhaps you are the unhealthy one? I don't come in here and point out your lunch and say "wow, aren't you unhealthy" can you just let me eat my food? There is nothing wrong with being healthy". Awaiting a defensive backlash to come my way, I was surprised when she said "your right, we should all be eating like you".

And then continued to eat her ginger beef, fried rice, chicken balls, and egg rolls. Sigh.

Am I the only one surrounded by lunatics? I need to find a job where I am around normal functioning people who don't act like it is the last day they are going to eat before going on Survivor. Other thank becoming a nutritionist, I really am not sure if I will ever find an office filled with all normal people. Remember my office girl that quit weight watchers and decided to just eat healthy and work out? nope, she stopped, apparently it was too hard for her. And the one on South Beach or low carb, or whatever the hell she was on, stopped, she now is just eating like a starved alien who has just discovered North American food. Why can't people understand that just because you aren't 'on a diet' doesn't mean you have to eat like a ravenous zombie. Diets? What the hell! We all know they don't work, we all know that severally restricting your calories makes you hungry causing you to gorge and binge eat.

Just eat healthy, it is so simple! Need chips? Go get organic chips and have a few, not the whole bag. Need Nachos? Make them healthy with organic whole grain chips, low fat cheese (even try feta instead!) load the nachos up with veggies instead of beef. Need ice cream? Have a little bit of natural icecream with natural ingredients! Why is everyone so weak all the time. No, you don’t NEED to have a burger. No you are not going to DIE if you don’t eat that chocolate milkshake. Jesus, when will people stop trying to justify their stupidity and grow a pair!

I always used to get so annoyed when people would say to me “it’s not a diet, it’s a lifestyle change”. I would defensively want to bark at them: MY LIFESTYLE IS FINE. But now (even though I believe my lifestyle is fine) I get what they were saying. Because just because I eat healthy, doesn’t mean I am on a diet. It is just my lifestyle.

Make it yours if you haven’t already.

Oh yeah, work on that body image!

I recently read an article titled “What I wish I knew when I was younger” god, how awesome would it be to know all that you know now when you where younger? How different our lives would be! Most of the article had a lot of good advice from a plus 50 year old woman telling the twenty-somethings of today (wear sunscreen, try new things, be financially savvy, etc...) but there was one major item left out: To eat healthy food and be active. If I knew then what I knew now, I would never have consumed the amount of hotdogs and orange pop I did when I was a kid.

Anyway, I am not here to bash the article, rather to promote my favourite part of the article:

“You are at least ten times prettier than you think you are. That holds true no matter how pretty you already think you are! Don't believe me? Ask your mother/auntie/grannie if she thought she was pretty when she was twenty. She'll say, "no." Then find a photo of her at that age. See what I mean?”

How true is this statement? What I think all my friends are gorgeous and have great bodies, but I am sure if you ask them they would tell you exactly what they hate about their body, and what they wish they could change. Stupid society drowns us daily with photoshopped/airbrushed/professionally make-up-hair-done-designer-clothes-wearing woman. And most of us have an unrealistic vision of beauty. Take a lot at these pictures:

So, really, if these ‘fake’ photos were not around, would our level of beauty be so high? Remember, even though we stress about what we eat to be healthy, working out to stay fit to tone and have a rocking body, there are certain things we need to accept about our body, this I am realizing as I enter my 30s and those good damn eye wrinkles get bigger, they belly is always looking pudgy, learn to accept your own beauty, and don’t pump toxic hormones into your face!

Article I read:  http://lifestyle.ca.msn.com/real-life/inner-you/ymc-article.aspx?cp-documentid=24372313

New post soon :)

New Years Resolution: Run a 10k. CHECK!

I did it, my first 10k run. I can’t believe it. If someone told me a year ago that I would be able to run 10k without stopping (yes, it is hard to drink water out of a cup while running) in my underwear (I will explain later) I would have told them they where nutso. But here I am, 15 lbs lighter, stronger, and full of determination.

My team (well, more of a duo—it was my friend and I) raised over $1000 for below the waist cancer research and we ran in the Underwear Affair—raising awareness for cancer ‘down-there-ness’. A massive 5k walk or 10k run where people wear everything from simple underwear over their running shorts, to full on costumes, to just a t-shirt with a cleaver name, to nothing but their skivvies. It was amazingly fun, and afterwards there is a huge after party, a bunch of happy sweaty scantily clad people dancing and not caring that their cellulite thigh is jiggling in front of everyone.

Running 10k wasn’t so fun, my legs and feet are aching and my hip flexors are so stiff I can barely walk today. But the feeling of completing a race, knowing that you did it. Amazing. I almost got teary eyed at the end (OK, I totally got teary eyed at the end...and when I passed the 8k mark (the furthest I have ever run, EVER)....and when a police officer high fived me...and when a little kid gave me two thumbs up and yelled ‘yay’ when each runner passed him) but, especially at the finish line, where people are cheering you on, high fiving you, whoot-wooing at you, and seeing yourself on the big screen (as immediately after the finish line you enter the after party) and not feeling embarrassed or self-conscious that you are on a god damn BIG SCREEN TV in your unders in front of thousands of people. Instead I looked up at the screen and thought “I am so proud of myself”.

I was wearing girl ‘boxer-briefs” which consistently rode up my crotch during the run, and I had a pink undershirt tucked into them. Walking around before the race, I have literally never been more aware of my thighs in my whole life. I mean, you can suck in your gut when you are trying to look thin, but what the heck can you do to hide your wiggle-waggle thighs? Despite being in wedgie central most of the evening, I actually felt OK baring myself a little bit. This is highly thanks to all the other people that also shed their inhibitions. Hell, if a woman with 30% body fat can wear lace undies and a lace camisole, then certainly I should have no problem wearing large ‘short style’ underwear.

Thank you to everyone who supported me. This is a great cause, not only to raise money, but also to bring more awareness to those cancers that people don’t discuss so much. Not too many people want to have a race to raise money for ‘ASS & VAGINA CANCER’. Can you imagine? “Hello workmates, can you sponsor me to run in the ASS CANCER race?” Jesus! Thanks to the Underwear Affair, all money raised is for ALL cancers below the waist. 

Here is our super clever team name:

                                                                                                          

Hot Yoga

Finally I got to try hot yoga tonight. I have had so many mixed reviews, some love it, some hate it, some say the heat makes you stretch more than you should and that is bad, some say stretching more than you think you can is good. Some say they feel like they are going to pass out when in the hot room. Either way, I like stretching, being hot, and burning calories, so I will love hot yoga I am sure.
For this class I am at a swanky overly zen yoga studio that does nothing but yoga. I am waiting outside the studio door with about 40 other people, so naturally I size up everyone there. I am the second fattest, that sucks. Everyone else’s posture is better than mine, which also sucks. Clearly I am not a serious yoga goer, as I don’t have two towels, I don’t have a matching glass water jug thing, and I am obviously wearing way too much clothing. I thought capris and a tank top would be OK, but looks like shorty short shorts are the only way to hot yoga it up.

A ridiculously smoking hot guy comes over and waits at the door, I want to reach out and touch him to see if he is real, or just a figment of my imagination, but truly I don’t think my imagination could dream up someone so gorgeous. He opens his mouth to talk to the guy next to him and....Australian accent!!! Oh man, what a hottie.

Finally the door opens and we all pour into the room. It really isn’t that hot in here, what are people talking about? This is more like ‘warm yoga’. I position the center top of my yoga matt on the little arrow on the floor (making sure to stay far away from the hot Aussie or I won’t be able to focus on my downward dog) and I cannot believe how close I am to everyone around me. There are now about 50 of us jammed into this room. And, yes, it is getting warmer. Everyone is doing their own yoga poses while we wait for the instructor. I don’t know what to do so I just sit there and try to correct my posture.

Finally we get started. Man it is warm in here. Why is the girl beside me sweeting so much, it isn’t THAT hot. Thank goodness there is no B.O. stench in here as that would make me vomit all over my shinier-than-everyone-else’s-yoga-matt-as-mine-is-brand-newbie. About 30 minutes in I feel like I am going to pass out, but I like it. I like the tingly warm sensation, I like how my instructor is reminding me to breathe and correcting my positioning (he must sense I am a newbie), I like holding a weird pose and shaking and pushing through until finally you get to release and feel the calmness rush over you.

I am DRIPPING sweat, it is running into my eyes, down my back, giving me swass, wtf is my shin sweating? How does ones shin sweat? Why do I not have a headband on? My hair is sticking to my face. I can feel my cheeks burning up, and my instructor must have seen my fire engine red cheeks as he asked me if I was OK. God, can I exude any more “FIRST TIME TO HOT YOGA” vibes? Jesus, please don’t faint, please don’t fall over!

Finally we are done the hard stuff in into the cool down (if you can get any cooler in a room as hot as the sun). I am glistening with sweat, and I look like I was just thrown into a pool with my clothes on. But I feel so amazing. Very relaxed, very zen, and very tired.

This is a lot of fun. I definitely recommend it and I will be doing it again.

Make sure to bring:
lots of water, and make sure you have stayed hydrated throughout the day.
A large towel to put over your matt AND a small towel to soak up a bucket of perspiration.
Wear the least amount of clothing possible, when I am a sexy fit bitch I will totally be one of those skanks in class with the teeny shorts and sportsbra only.
Wear your hair up and away from your face.

Vacation Weight

After ten fabulous days of vacation doing nothing but hanging out with friends and family in the sun, I have consumed more calories than an oil tycoon at a Texas pig roast. I really am massively surprised that I only gained a mere 2 pounds in ten whole freaking days.

Oh vacation, how many times have you been on holidays and heard the following or some version of the following:

“Have some, you’re on vacation”
“You can’t be on vacation and not drink, don’t worry about it”
“Dessert doesn’t count when you are on vacation”

Why is it that sabotaging healthyness is normal banter while on vacation? I had turned down many drinks many desserts many second helpings and many many many treats and snacks and I still felt like I ate like a pig all week. God, can you imagine if you ate everything you were offered on vacation? And am I the only one who can BBQ meat without lathering it in BBQ sauce? Or eat a salad with no dressing? How about not choosing chips as a side dish? Is this normal? It is easy to ask for your food to be prepared without added crap when it is you and a few good friends, but what about when you are attending multiple large gatherings with your old school family? Where it is impossible to have a say in what is prepared. What do you do? Not eat? Mop the BBQ sauce of your chicken breast with your napkin? Use lettuce leaves as a hamburger bun and then hear people say “uh, are you on Atkins?” because you are not eating white hamburger buns and you only have tomato slices and mustard on your burger?

The vacation weight battle happens whenever you are away from home, even for just a night. You are either eating out or eating food that someone else made. Thankfully most hotels have the ability to heat water up so you can still have oatmeal for breaky! Eating breakfast out is the biggest waste of calories and money I can even think of. When else do you sit down and eat a breakfast bigger than your head other than when you are on vacation? (or, when you where hungover in university?) Not too often. Pass on the breakfast and brunches out!

Thankfully for the most part of my vacation, I was with rocking normal people, who knew I would be stressed from multiple family feedings and they had amazing healthy meals prepared. These will be mentioned in the next wave of recipes.