Monday, May 31, 2010

Back from vacation, new post soon...

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

New post soon, I am currently on vacation visiting multiple friends and family :)

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Oh Happiest of Happy Days!

The dreaded digital scale, staring me in the face, I can hear it mocking me “Uh bitch, I am digital, no errors in reading here like your old analog scale, I am the truth! Step on me so I can determine the outcome of your day, mwaa haa ha”.

Stupid scale thinks it’s so smart!

Now, before you weigh yourself, you must do the following:
Use the washroom (to get rid of excess pee & poo that could make you weight more)
Take off all clothes
Don’t eat or drink prior to weighing
(god, obsessed much?)

Weigh yourself in the morning, as that is when you are lightest, so therefore you will feel better about looking at the number. All night your body is burning calories, you haven’t eaten in around ten hours, you have had a lot of evaporation through your mouth, and you have an empty tummy.

OK, ready to face the truth.

Please pause here for exciting news.






Best. Day. EVARRRR!

Time to measure....and? What do you think? Well, one inch lost from Bust (boo), waist (yay), love handle area, and 2 inches from butt (hips) total of 5 inches lost. Sigh, I am giddy like a school girl, or a girl who isn't in school.

Amazing! Being ridiculously diligent about what I put in my mouth and being active, hmmmm, who would have ever thought that eating healthy and working out would make you get skinny?

15 lbs away from goal weight, unbelievable!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Tid Bits

After an amazing weekend filled with biking, yoga, and hiking-hiking with running uphill intervals a la Bootcamp style, my friend challenged me to do this, and....being a super healthy fit wannabe, I had no choice but to say yes! I have the sorest ass in North America right now, and boy does it feel good ;)
Another plus: I ran into a friend whom I haven’t seen since October of 2009, and he totally noticed a huge change in me, saying that I (and I quote) “look skinny”. HAAAALLELUJAH! Hallelujah!!!! I don’t think there is a better comment out there than that!

Two more days until the Month weigh in. I am stressed and scared. Not losing any weight in a week isn’t SOOO SOOO bad, but what if you don’t lose any in a month? I may break yet another scale with anger. I better jump on that scale and see -30 pounds! (sigh, we can dream right?) Wouldn’t it be awesome if you could just wake up and be skinny? I will have to go have 2 ‘last chance workouts’ before the fateful Thursday morning scale meeting!

Wish me luck! (I need it)!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010


Please have a look at this video, and get ready to drop your jaw.  It is a real restaurant.  I don't know what is more unbelievable, the fact this restaurant exists, or the fact that they actually have a burger that contains over 8,000 calories (4 DAYS worth of calories, plus fries (all you can eat fry bar), plus coke, jesus!  That is like a week of crap-calories for one meal). 

I want to punch every 'nurse' in this place...clearly they don't eat there!

Thanks to Amanda D. for sending this in.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Self Sabotage

Have you ever been to that point where you are doing so good in your get in shape regime, where you have lost some weight, you have lost some inches, you have been ridiculously diligent about what you put in your mouth, and then you do something bad? Maybe you were shopping in the organic market, and a fresh baked organic oatmeal and raisin cookie the size of your face popped in front of you, and you bought it thinking “organic cookies can’t be as bad as regular cookies, I mean, there is less than 6 ingredients in this cookie, and I can pronounce them all....soooo it won’t hurt if I buy it....and only eat ¼....or even ½ the cookie”.

And then you eat half and put the rest away, vowing not to touch it, but you actually eat more than half?

Alright, goddamnit, I ate the whole thing!

Now I am stupid feeling, so I have to go out for a run to make myself feel better. Just because I have organic sugar and butter in my cookie, unfortunately doesn’t make it healthy. I wish it did however, because fresh baked cookie smell must be what heaven smells like.

Punishment: Run with intervals followed by boring arm weights

Monday, May 10, 2010

Hawaii Chair

There certainly are some silly fitness products out there, this one...needs to be seen:

Wednesday, May 5, 2010


Man, I hate when I re-read a post the next day and find a spelling error. My grade three teacher was right; I never will learn how to proofread if I don’t stop day dreaming about those damn hatching chickens under that stupid red light!

I absolutely love when people write in or comment....well, I like the good comments, the mean ones make me sad, but everyone is entitled to their opinion right? Even if it is wrong.

So a lot of fit bitches out there would like some oatmeal recipes, so I am going to share my favourites. Experiment as much as you can, if you eat oatmeal as much as I do, you will appreciate the variety! I keep a glass jar on my counter (along with a jar of flaxseed, protein powder, and raw almonds) so they are there reminding me that a quick healthy breaky or snack is only a few minutes in the making.

Rolled or Steel Cut?

Rolled oats are just that, an oat rolled out, you can get these in regular or thick rolled (same thing, just the actual rollers used to roll the oats are set at different thickness).

Steel cut oats are oats cut with a blade (um...made of steel?), these take longer to cook. Any grain that takes a long time to cook is SUPER good for you! Which is why these types of oats are the best! However, I am a busy freaking girl so I use the rolled oats, and most times I throw them in the microwave with a guesstimated amount of water. NO INSTANT OATS OR OATMEALS FOR FIT BITCHES!

Benefits of OATS!

1. You will be strong, like horse!

2. They can help lower bad cholesterol.

3. Oats stabilize your blood sugar. They keep you fuller for longer. Protein, fibre, minerals, vitamins OH MY!

4. Cheap cheap cheap cheap!

Whatever oats you decide to use for the below recipes, just follow the water to oat ratio on your oat package for one serving. On the weekends, I do these in a pot but to be honest? I am a lazy morning person and I usually microwave my oats and eyeball all the ingredients. So, add the ingredients to your liking. These recipes are so simple your cat could do them, get creative. If you make something you don’t like, throw it out and try again (oats are cheap remember?) If you think I use WAY too much nutmeg, then just at 1/8 a tsp first to see if you like it...whatever your fit little heart desires.

Alright, cook you oats and add the following for a change up:

1. Coconut Cream oatmeal.

I am putting this recipe first as it is the highest in (healthy)fat & carbs & calories. After you eat this go for a hike and work it off!

Substitute ½ the water with light coconut milk and a tablespoon of flaked (unsweetened) coconut. So yummy!

Have more time: add half a sliced banana (I know you will add a whole banana even though I said just add a half, so buy small bananas, not these massive bananas that make your boyfriend jealous)

2. Chai oatmeal

Throw a chai tea bag in the water before you add the oats, allow steepage for a min and then add your oats and sprinkle cinnamon to your liking (I use 1 tsp).

Have more time: Also good with this recipe is adding some real vanilla bean. Mmmm.

3. Tea of your choice oatmeal

Doing the same as above, but experiment with different tea. Apple Spice tea = Apple spice oatmeal. Blueberry tea = blueberry oatmeal. So simple and healthy! You are adding tonnes of flavour without adding fat, sugar, or nasty fake sweetener crap!

Have more time: add some chopped fruit to match your tea (berry mixed tea with chopped strawberries YUM)

4. Apple oatmeal

Top your cooked oatmeal with two tablespoons of Organic Apple Butter (no, it is not butter, but it is spreadable like jam...think very concentrated applesauce)

Have more time: add sliced apple

5. Protein Packed Choco-Peanut Butter Oatmeal

Add two tablespoons of chocolate protein powder (I use VEGA brand) about ¼ cup of skim milk stir, and then add 1 tablespoon of natural peanut butter.

(Experiment with whatever type of protein powder you use)

6. Raisin Spice Oatmeal

Add raisins to the water when you add your oats (2 or 3 tablespoons) stir in 1/4 tsp nutmeg and ½ tsp of cinnamon

7. Maple walnut Oatmeal

I only use 1/2 tablespoon REAL natural maple syrup (no, not Aunt Jemima!) but if you still have a sweet tooth add a full tablespoon, then add two tablespoons chopped walnut

8. Honey Cranberry Oatmeal

Add two tablespoons of dried cranberries (not ones that had sugar added, look for organic dried cranberries sweetened with apple juice) to the water with the oats and top the cooked oatmeal with some honey.

9. Banana Bread Oatmeal

I love bananas

Mash up 1 banana, 2 tsp of real vanilla extract or add real vanilla bean, add 1/4 tsp nutmeg and ¼ tsp cinnamon, and 2 tablespoons of chopped walnut. Then add the cooked oats, stir, and add some skim milk to lessen the thickness.

10. Omega Power Oatmeal

Add: 1 tablespoon of flaxseed and chopped berries of your choice

I like my oatmeal stick to your spoon thick! So if you like yours less stick to your ribs, add more liquid when cooking, or pour some skim milk over your final product. ENJOY!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Where am I? Horseville? Because all I hear is a bunch of Naysayers!

Remember a while ago I said I was going to lose it?

I did. Twice....well really once, because the second time was an extension of the first time. It was recess time (morning smoke break for most people at my hell-office) and I was super excited to eat my snack: Yogurt with berries topped with oats and flax seed (mmm protein, healthy fats, omegas, carbs, fibre, and under 300 cals!) Tweedle-DUMB walked by and asked me what I was eating, when I told him he said “Uh sounds like a horse”.


Everyone was silent, and I felt I went to my desk and ate my horse snack in peace. It was delicious!

He then walked by my desk again and said “Neighhhh, how was your horse snack?”



So proud of my witty comeback, I waited for a rebuttal, but he did what most idiots do when they don’t have anything to say to a woman who has just spoken her mind, he made that stupid ‘rowrrr’ cat sound. GOD! What a dick!

So, I am calm again, I think I may just walk around my office with ear plugs and eat my food in my car.

Horse Parfait
Layer in this order:
½ cup low fat yogurt
1 cup of your choice of berries (I used strawberries and blackberries this time)
¼ cup of rolled or steel cut oats
1 tablespoon of flax seed