Wednesday, January 26, 2011


Feeling like a fat whale today? Watch A&E’s new show “Heavy” I guarantee you will immediately feel better about how much you do in your workouts, the type of food you eat, and the way you look. I often find everyone larger than me thinks my body is prefect, and will make fun of me if I ever say I need to lose weight. People thinner than me will say that I am fine, as to not offend me. But people around my size will sit and bitch with me, understand that even a loss of 5 pounds will send your mood from suicide watch to the elevated happy high I assume only skinny people feel when they get dressed in the morning and their jeans fit their ass perfectly without the use of spanks (thank god for can’t have the slightest bit of muffin top with skinny jeans, or any jeans for that matter, it’s just gross, and irresponsible wardrobe picking).

So for me the banishing of muffin top and trying to tone (just tone flab, what the hell is your problem?) has made me extra vigilant in my search for “fat banishing food”. I am not sure if this is what it should be about “Food that you can eat a lot of for a low amount of calories so you are not gnawing at the bit when your meal is over like a fat kid with Prader-Willi syndrome”.

So fill up half your plate with these low cal veggies, fewer than 100 calories for 2 cups:

Kale is hard to describe if you have never had it. It looks tough and prickly, like if spinach and broccoli had a love child and named it Kale. Kale is high in vitamins A, K, and C. Rich in minerals, and low in calories (just under 40 calories for a whole cup of kale). Easy to cook (steam, sauté in broth, or bake it and make kale ‘chips’).  I love kale, but everyone I ask hates it.  Try at your own risk (cook WAY longer than you think you 15 - 20 minutes).

Raw cauliflower makes me want to GAG! But roasted or boiled and then mashed up like potatoes = yum! Has almost half your daily requirement of vitamin C and has less than 30 calories a cup! My favourite way is to roast the florets with garlic, pepper, paprika, and sea salt.

Even though it makes about 50% of peoples' pee smell weird (me included), I would eat this every day. Less than 30 calories a cup! Omegas, iron, vitamin K. Nom nom nom. Two favourite ways to prepare are the simple: Stick them in a pan of boiling water for 2 minutes. Or toss them in spices and roast them on the BBQ.

Steamed Spinach (gross), lettuce (duh), cucumber, celery, leafy stuff, onions, Broccoli, mushrooms, cabbage. All are low in calories, but you may not want to fill up half your pate with chopped onion (side note: always sauté your onions until opaque, it takes away the strong ‘onion-y-ness’) so add these veggies to other items. Example: maybe you need to have mashed potatoes, and will die if you don’t get them, use half potato, half cauliflower, throw in some chopped steamed spinach and sautéed onions. Eat more salads (watch that dressing!) and loads of veggie stir fry dishes (don’t dump sugary sauce on your stir fry, use natural ingredients and spices. My fav homemade stir fry sauces:

1. Soy sauce (2 tablespoonsish) mixed with natural PB (1 tablespoonish)and chilli flakes (dash)
2. Sesame Seeds, chopped onion, roasted garlic mushed, and broth
3. Red Thai Curry Paste (spoonful) and broth or lite coconut milk (1/2 cup)

Try it! And share your own recipes and tips for the other readers.

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